Indyhannahjones
10-09-2010, 07:01 PM
Hi there,
I'm new to the site so apologies if I'm in the wrong section! I've not been diagnosed with anything but I've been seeing the local counsellor and the doctor and I'm just unsure of what to do.
The last few years have been rather tough; my brother wasn't well, my gran had dementia and died, my best friend decided that because I was moving away that I was no longer worth having as a friend and treated me like dirt and I haven't heard from her in years, a guy last year decided to use me as a stepping stone between his ex girlfriend and current one so that he could prove the ex wrong (she said he'd go running to the girl he's now with - oh the things you learn after after the event!) are the biggest ones I can think of at the moment - there have been other things too.
I've been having very mixed moods that follow no real pattern (I've tried to keep as an accurate diary as possible). I can flick from totally bouncy and hyper, my mind will be racing and I can't stop bouncing in my seat to total emptiness where there is absolutely no reason to anything and I am the lowest of the low, I am nothing and deserve all the crap thrown at me. I am also surprised when people don't just laugh at me in the street, I'm sure that they are and some days I would far rather not go out because I'm sure that that's what will happen. I've never felt quite accepted anywhere and I've had this feeling since childhood - sometimes I can forget about it but it keeps reoccuring. A lot of the time I feel completely detached from everything and everyone, almost like I'm wrapped in a little bubble of fog that acts as a layer keeping me away from everything.
I started to see one of the other counsellors last year who's now retired and I've been popping my head into the doctors every so often. I realised that at the start of this year I am still feeling the same way I have been for over a year. One of the reasons I wasn't as concerned is because I have an underactive thyroid but it's now at a normal level and has been for about 6 months but the symptoms have been continuing never-the-less. After being back to the doctors he's suggested anti-depressants because it sounds like I'm having a depressive episode but it feels like more than that.
I would be really grateful for any ideas or suggestions anyone has,
Many thanks,
Indyhannahjones
I'm new to the site so apologies if I'm in the wrong section! I've not been diagnosed with anything but I've been seeing the local counsellor and the doctor and I'm just unsure of what to do.
The last few years have been rather tough; my brother wasn't well, my gran had dementia and died, my best friend decided that because I was moving away that I was no longer worth having as a friend and treated me like dirt and I haven't heard from her in years, a guy last year decided to use me as a stepping stone between his ex girlfriend and current one so that he could prove the ex wrong (she said he'd go running to the girl he's now with - oh the things you learn after after the event!) are the biggest ones I can think of at the moment - there have been other things too.
I've been having very mixed moods that follow no real pattern (I've tried to keep as an accurate diary as possible). I can flick from totally bouncy and hyper, my mind will be racing and I can't stop bouncing in my seat to total emptiness where there is absolutely no reason to anything and I am the lowest of the low, I am nothing and deserve all the crap thrown at me. I am also surprised when people don't just laugh at me in the street, I'm sure that they are and some days I would far rather not go out because I'm sure that that's what will happen. I've never felt quite accepted anywhere and I've had this feeling since childhood - sometimes I can forget about it but it keeps reoccuring. A lot of the time I feel completely detached from everything and everyone, almost like I'm wrapped in a little bubble of fog that acts as a layer keeping me away from everything.
I started to see one of the other counsellors last year who's now retired and I've been popping my head into the doctors every so often. I realised that at the start of this year I am still feeling the same way I have been for over a year. One of the reasons I wasn't as concerned is because I have an underactive thyroid but it's now at a normal level and has been for about 6 months but the symptoms have been continuing never-the-less. After being back to the doctors he's suggested anti-depressants because it sounds like I'm having a depressive episode but it feels like more than that.
I would be really grateful for any ideas or suggestions anyone has,
Many thanks,
Indyhannahjones