MsSarah
06-15-2009, 12:38 AM
I havent posted on here in ages, the last things i talked about were moving (we moved and i love it here) med changes and going into the hospital, a lot has changed since then. that was in november. for a brief history when i was 7 i saw my sister get hit by a car and that resulted in her death and then from age 8-12 i was molested repeatedly. and then when i was 15 i was diagnosed. i am 17 now. i was diagnosed with bipolar, borderline personality disorder, and post traumatic stress disorder. (bipolar runs highly on my fathers side and schizophrenia on my mothers side)
On jan 9 2009 my fathers father passed away after a 6 yr battle with lung cancer. on ja n 23 2009 my father committed suicide. I was hospitalized for my safety, and i spoke at his funeral the following words I was impressed with how well that i got through it... but its still fresh you know? I thank God every day that i didnt have a key to his apartment.. i was the last person to talk to him and he told me that he couldnt take me to school and then said , "im not doing too good" i said "how?" he said "mentally" and then he said "im sorry i let you down" and every time i think of that i cry and think of Thank You by Johnny Reid
I just miss him so much which is to be expected obviously this month is especially going to be hard because fathers day and june 29 is my 18th birthday. and even though he's not here. he is in my heart and he will always be there.
Not everything has been that bad since january, im getting through it as best i can and its sad because only my mother and i know how he died because it wouldve been too hard on my family after losing my grandpa because our family is real close. i only knew because i was the one who called 911 i talked to him ;last on wednesday jan 21 2009 and they found him jan 23 2009 but i know he was gone before then, because i would talk to him everyday... and he lived just down the road...
On a good note I've made a wonderful friend who understands my mental illness and what i am going through and i have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour. so i have my church family and they are wonderful
Thank You lyrics
If I only had, two words left to say to you.
With my last breath I'd come face the truth to you.
You've never left my side, even when I fell behind.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you for sharing all your love and all your dreams.
Thank-you for every tear of happiness I've cried.
Thank-you for laying down beside me here tonight.
When I close my eyes, I say a prayer for one more day with you.
And when I wake, I embrace the one who pulls me though.
Who pulls me through the storm when I can't go on.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you for sharin' all your love and your dreams.
Thank-you, for every tear of happiness I've cried.
Thank-you for layin' down beside me here tonight.
You've never let me down.
Its like you don't know how.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you, for sharin all your love and all your dreams.
Thank-you.
Thank-you
what i spoke
"The greatest gift I ever had Came from God; I call him Dad."
Not how did he die, but how did he live?
Not what did he gain, but what did he give?
These are the units to measure the worth
Of a man as a man, regardless of birth.
Not, what was his church, nor what was his creed?
But had he befriended those really in need?
Was he ever ready, with word of good cheer,
To bring back a smile, to banish a tear?
Not what did the sketch in the newspaper say,
But how many were sorry when he passed away
Footprints In The Sand
You walked with me,
Footprints in the sand,
And helped me understand,
Where I'm going,
You walked with me,
When I was all alone,
With so much unknown,
Along the way,
Then I heard you say,
I promise you,
I'm always there,
When your heart is filled with sorrow,
And despair, I'll carry you
When you need a friend
You'll find my footprints in the sand.
I see my life flash across the sky,
So many times have I been so afraid.
And just when I, have thought I lost my way,
You gave me strength to carry on,
It's then I heard you say,
I promise you
I'm always there
When your heart is filled
With sorrow and despair
And, I'll carry you
When you need a friend
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. Though we were never rich the love my dad expressed on a daily basis was more than enough for me. I didnt need materialistic things as long as at the end of the day I knew my father loved me and was proud of me- that was enough for me.Any man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad. Dad, you're someone to look up to- no matter how tall I've grown, no matter how old I get you will always be there for me. You will always have a special place in my heart and, Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever.
Fathers Are Wonderful People
Fathers are wonderful people
too little understood,
And we do not sing their praises
as often as we should...
For, somehow, Father seems to be
the man who pays the bills,
While Mother binds up little hurts
and nurses all our ills...
And Father struggles daily
to live up to "his image"
As protector and provider
and "hero of the scrimmage"
And perhaps that is the reason
we sometimes get the notion
That Fathers are not subject
to the thing we call emotion,
But if you look inside Dad's heart,
where no one else can see,
You'll find he's sentimental
and as "soft" as he can be...
But he's so busy everyday
in the grueling race of life,
He leaves the sentimental stuff
to his children and his wife...
But Fathers are just wonderful
in a million different ways,
And they merit loving compliments
and accolades of praise,
For the only reason Dad aspires
to fortune and success
Is to make the family proud of him
and to bring them happiness...
And like our Heavenly Father,
he's a guardian and a guide,
Someone that we can count on
to be always on our side.
I will always be Daddy's little girl.
If you can tie your shoe, eat your vegetables, learn to share, say thank you, or do anything else it takes to get through the day ...Thank Your Dad.
I know your life on earth was troubled
And only you could know the pain
You weren't afraid to face the devil
You were no stranger to the rain
Go rest high on that mountain
Son your work on earth is done
Go to heaven a-shoutin'
Love for the Father and the Son
Oh, how we cried the day you left us
We gathered round your grave to grieve
Wish I could see the angels' faces
When they hear your sweet voice sing
Go rest high on that mountain
Son, your work on earth is done
Go to heaven a-shoutin'
Love for the Father and the Son
Those we love remain with us
For love itself lives on,
And cherished memories never fade
Because a loved one's gone.
Those we love can never be
More than a thought apart,
Far as long as there is memory,
They'll live on in the heart.
I love you Daddy, Much, Ever, Whole Wide World, More Than The World, Don't Let The Bed Bugs Bite. Goodnight. I love you.
<3
If youve read this far words of encouragement are much appreciated.
On jan 9 2009 my fathers father passed away after a 6 yr battle with lung cancer. on ja n 23 2009 my father committed suicide. I was hospitalized for my safety, and i spoke at his funeral the following words I was impressed with how well that i got through it... but its still fresh you know? I thank God every day that i didnt have a key to his apartment.. i was the last person to talk to him and he told me that he couldnt take me to school and then said , "im not doing too good" i said "how?" he said "mentally" and then he said "im sorry i let you down" and every time i think of that i cry and think of Thank You by Johnny Reid
I just miss him so much which is to be expected obviously this month is especially going to be hard because fathers day and june 29 is my 18th birthday. and even though he's not here. he is in my heart and he will always be there.
Not everything has been that bad since january, im getting through it as best i can and its sad because only my mother and i know how he died because it wouldve been too hard on my family after losing my grandpa because our family is real close. i only knew because i was the one who called 911 i talked to him ;last on wednesday jan 21 2009 and they found him jan 23 2009 but i know he was gone before then, because i would talk to him everyday... and he lived just down the road...
On a good note I've made a wonderful friend who understands my mental illness and what i am going through and i have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour. so i have my church family and they are wonderful
Thank You lyrics
If I only had, two words left to say to you.
With my last breath I'd come face the truth to you.
You've never left my side, even when I fell behind.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you for sharing all your love and all your dreams.
Thank-you for every tear of happiness I've cried.
Thank-you for laying down beside me here tonight.
When I close my eyes, I say a prayer for one more day with you.
And when I wake, I embrace the one who pulls me though.
Who pulls me through the storm when I can't go on.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you for sharin' all your love and your dreams.
Thank-you, for every tear of happiness I've cried.
Thank-you for layin' down beside me here tonight.
You've never let me down.
Its like you don't know how.
Thank-you, thank-you for the life you've given me.
Thank-you, for sharin all your love and all your dreams.
Thank-you.
Thank-you
what i spoke
"The greatest gift I ever had Came from God; I call him Dad."
Not how did he die, but how did he live?
Not what did he gain, but what did he give?
These are the units to measure the worth
Of a man as a man, regardless of birth.
Not, what was his church, nor what was his creed?
But had he befriended those really in need?
Was he ever ready, with word of good cheer,
To bring back a smile, to banish a tear?
Not what did the sketch in the newspaper say,
But how many were sorry when he passed away
Footprints In The Sand
You walked with me,
Footprints in the sand,
And helped me understand,
Where I'm going,
You walked with me,
When I was all alone,
With so much unknown,
Along the way,
Then I heard you say,
I promise you,
I'm always there,
When your heart is filled with sorrow,
And despair, I'll carry you
When you need a friend
You'll find my footprints in the sand.
I see my life flash across the sky,
So many times have I been so afraid.
And just when I, have thought I lost my way,
You gave me strength to carry on,
It's then I heard you say,
I promise you
I'm always there
When your heart is filled
With sorrow and despair
And, I'll carry you
When you need a friend
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. Though we were never rich the love my dad expressed on a daily basis was more than enough for me. I didnt need materialistic things as long as at the end of the day I knew my father loved me and was proud of me- that was enough for me.Any man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad. Dad, you're someone to look up to- no matter how tall I've grown, no matter how old I get you will always be there for me. You will always have a special place in my heart and, Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever.
Fathers Are Wonderful People
Fathers are wonderful people
too little understood,
And we do not sing their praises
as often as we should...
For, somehow, Father seems to be
the man who pays the bills,
While Mother binds up little hurts
and nurses all our ills...
And Father struggles daily
to live up to "his image"
As protector and provider
and "hero of the scrimmage"
And perhaps that is the reason
we sometimes get the notion
That Fathers are not subject
to the thing we call emotion,
But if you look inside Dad's heart,
where no one else can see,
You'll find he's sentimental
and as "soft" as he can be...
But he's so busy everyday
in the grueling race of life,
He leaves the sentimental stuff
to his children and his wife...
But Fathers are just wonderful
in a million different ways,
And they merit loving compliments
and accolades of praise,
For the only reason Dad aspires
to fortune and success
Is to make the family proud of him
and to bring them happiness...
And like our Heavenly Father,
he's a guardian and a guide,
Someone that we can count on
to be always on our side.
I will always be Daddy's little girl.
If you can tie your shoe, eat your vegetables, learn to share, say thank you, or do anything else it takes to get through the day ...Thank Your Dad.
I know your life on earth was troubled
And only you could know the pain
You weren't afraid to face the devil
You were no stranger to the rain
Go rest high on that mountain
Son your work on earth is done
Go to heaven a-shoutin'
Love for the Father and the Son
Oh, how we cried the day you left us
We gathered round your grave to grieve
Wish I could see the angels' faces
When they hear your sweet voice sing
Go rest high on that mountain
Son, your work on earth is done
Go to heaven a-shoutin'
Love for the Father and the Son
Those we love remain with us
For love itself lives on,
And cherished memories never fade
Because a loved one's gone.
Those we love can never be
More than a thought apart,
Far as long as there is memory,
They'll live on in the heart.
I love you Daddy, Much, Ever, Whole Wide World, More Than The World, Don't Let The Bed Bugs Bite. Goodnight. I love you.
<3
If youve read this far words of encouragement are much appreciated.